update

Wow, it's been so incredibly long since I've had time to use both my hands at the computer. During the middle of the night I feed N and surf the web, but I don't tend to write because I only have one hand free at a time.

As usual I have a lot on my mind, but not enough time to expound on it all.

I was in my friend's wedding on this past Saturday. I have so many emotions after it is all done. JP if you are reading this and we haven't discussed the day, before you read more, let's talk about it 1st, it's not bad just would rather talk than have you read it here 1st...now that's a teaser for you isn't it!?!

My immediate feeling was that I was a totally inadequate "best woman" aka matron of honor. My friend's other friend with my same name, seems like she would have graced the job as best woman much better than me. A lot of people said to me, "wow, it's so great that you agreed to do this after just having had a baby". Each time I thought to myself or said to them, "the bride has looked after me more today than I did her". I know that the reason my friend asked me to be in her wedding had more to do with marriage than the actual wedding day. And while I am thankful for this truth about her, I guess the day after the wedding I felt that I really wished I could have done more to serve her on her wedding day.

On the actual day what I loved was watching the two of them become one. I loved seeing the love they have for one another, and the maturity and wisdom they have in coming together. I loved seeing my friend so happy, and I am excited to see how God uses their marriage in His kingdom work.

I've reflected a lot on relationships since Saturday. In particular my marriage. Watching two people who are in the "honeymoon" stage of their relationship reminded me of how special and sweet it is that I get to share each day with my husband. It's made me really want to stop and not take for granted the gift I have in T. It's also made me more aware just of how I speak to T and desiring to be more gentle and careful because of the preciousness of our lives shared together.

Surrounding the wedding, I had a friend who just recently moved from my town come back for a visit and for the wedding. She stayed with us from Thursday to Tuesday. It was soooo easy to have her around. She really has become like a sister to me and so today, the day after she left, I have become very "USA sick". In other words, I'm missing the comfort of the US. I'm not sure if I am highly emotional because of hormones, or just situation or what, but I guess today I ended up feeling a bit lonely. T starts work full time tomorrow, my friend is away on her honeymoon for two weeks, and my other friend returned home to Sydney. I'm cool with being alone and hanging out on my own, cool as long as I know that there are people within reaching distance, and I guess for some reason today, it feels like people are a bit out of reach. I've gotten so use to having T home all day, and then kinda use to him being gone till early afternoon, but now he'll be gone all day, and my two closest friends aren't reachable at the moment either. It's just my emotion of the moment, and I'm pretty sure tomorrow it'll all feel different. Yet, JP if you are reading this, I'm totally looking forward to your return, but totally stoked for you that you are away.

I'm praying for you KCJ, let me know how the ultrasound went.